Fallacies of BiSexuality

Most people understand the concepts of Heterosexual and HomoSexual and while gay bashers still run rampant, at least the world at large has figured out that homosexuals do exist and what it means to be homosexual. Then comes this whole other concept of BiSexuality and that has gays, lesbian and straight folk all scratching their heads. And with all matters of ignorance, we find erroneous beliefs.

This article speaks in braod sweeping gestures, but hopefully it grabs most of the larger fallacies about BiSexuality and dispels the myths for you. Send this link to any of your friends who don't quite understand you and tell you that you just "need to decide" already.

Bisexuals have to be attracted to both men and women equally.

~ Preference is exactly that... preference. A straight male could like both blondes and redheads, but it doesn't mean he has to like them both with the same intensity at any one given moment.

Inherent in their mulitple preference, BiSexualilty leads to promiscuity, making BiSexuals unable to commit to a monogamous relationship.

~ Again we will use the straight male. It could in fact find blondes and redheads perfectly equally attractive. That does not mean that if he happens to get into a relationship with a blonde that he will be unfathful in order to get this lust for redheads out of his system. And a step further brings us to the fact that he might as well be unfaithful with other blondes as well since that is one of his preferences and since he can't keep his pants up, there is no reason for the lack of faithfulness to stop there. And then he sees a cute Asian woman, she's not blonde or redheaded, but she is female and he does have a preference for woman, so he is probably promiscuious and chasing multiple woman at once.

BiSexuals can choose to be straight.

~ Yes, and that straight male in the prior two fallacies can choose to be gay and gays and lesbians can choose to be straight. Why not? BiSexuals do not choose their sexuality any more than the rest of us. They are born with it and can recount the childhood stories of being attracted to Stars on the Television of both genders, the same as everyone else was attracted to one or the other. And a BiSexual in a relationship with someone of the opposite gender does not mean that she has "straightened out" it just means, she is in love and that person happens to be of that gender. She is still attracted to people of the same gender, but we fall in love with people, not genders.

Bisexual people are just denying that they are gay

~ Denying it would be to remain in the closet and in an unhappy relationship with one gender or the other and never take the time to explore both sides of their sexuality. A BiSexual in a same sex relationship is still a BiSexual, even though the relationship may be gay and a BiSexual in a "straight" relationship is still a BiSexual who happens to be in a relationship with a person of the opposite gender. Dating a lesbian does not make you a lesbian if you are still attracted to men.

by Eric L Snyder 06.09.06